Sorry! It is a grassroots effort to track and catalog the dystopian surveillance cameras that have been placed on roadsides all over the country to spy on the public on behalf of the ruling class.

deflock.me

This has me cackling thanks

You’re right, I’m sorry.

My design is flawless otherwise though right??

Now that just seems a bit unrealistic, doesn’t it? Everyone knows nuclear reactors are quite heavy. Let’s not stoop to silliness.

To be fair, since it is also a 5MW cold fusion reactor, it is also rather heavy, so one does need to be stronger than the average person. It’s the ONLY downside to this innovative product. It even folds!

Thankfully, being shaped like an umbrella, the design already accounts for this by directing rain away from the power output located at the base of the handle. It’s Type C!

With my unlimited budget, I have also funded research to increase the official USB-C PD spec to a frankly irresponsible five megawatts of energy throughput.

Unlimited budget? My tactical umbrella is capable of generating 5MW of electricity from cold nuclear fusion.